Showing posts with label pony and poppy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label pony and poppy. Show all posts

Whining Wednesday or a junk tv confessional, I get my black belt and Olive prepares for the Dog Show

W hine 1 - So, I finally got a new cable cord for the tv in my studio and since I have been almost television-less for quite a while now

(listening to the radio or books on tape while I work)

I was like a dieter on a chocolate binge last week ....

First, I watched two episodes of What Not to Wear.

The premise of this show is that the hosts take unsuspecting women and, over the course of a week, teach them how to dress like gay men.

The women get a new wardrobe

(not anything they are ever going to wear again, of course)

out of it and I guess this is why they allow their flaws to be catalogued and closets plundered on national television. I know I'm not that strong. The second Stacy tried to wrench the Joan Jett t-shirt from my fingers, I would probably set myself on fire.

(confidential to producers- if this is something you would be interested in, please contact me through my agent, ie Olive)

Then I watched 3 episodes of Wife Swap, 2 episodes of Montel Williams, 2 days of Court TV, 2 episodes of Deadly Women, 2 episodes of Ghost Hunters, 2 episodes of I Shouldn't Be Alive, 1 episode of Dirty Jobs- the list goes on.

As you can imagine my head is about to explode. I think it is time to go junk tv cold turkey.

I will now be watching the Olympics and the Dog Show

(which has Olive practicing walking very fast with her tail in the air- I haven't the heart to tell her that her own breed- the four letter word that starts with M isn't on the AKC's radar)

so I can refocus and get myself off the tv smack.

Actually, I just remembered that on tomorrow's Montel they will be talking to women who were impregnated by devilish spirits

(which I think is code for Kevin Federline)

and some lady named Zelva (Zelva?) who is afraid of eggplant.

Hmm. I may hold off on my junk tv cold turkey for one more day.

Whine 2 - Now I promised hubby I would cut back on my posts with his name in them, so to protect his privacy and my blog's future involvement in a marital lawsuit I will just call him Mr. Mystery.

So anyhoo, I went to the movies on Sunday

(yes, we rocked Valentine's Day with the Wolfman, which is a film I totally do not recommend by the way - Whine 3)

with Mr. Mystery and - after the movie I went into the restroom in the mall.

(this is where it gets a little gross)